Hello, my fans! Top of the morning to you.
I'm having a TGIF feeling wash over me today. Might have something to do with the fact that it is actually Friday, but I'd like to think deniably otherwise. :)
Moving on...
I've been having thoughts about depression, and what it's like for a person who has it, and how to help them. We have to pick a health issue for an assignment, and I've decided to go with depression. The issue fascinates me, whilst also makes me feel empathetic, mostly because I have suffered the illness before as well. My tutor told me that there's impairment in the cognitive side of the brain that processes logic and blocks the flow of blindness to emotions. I was taken aback by the reference to cognitive impairment; I mean I am not impaired myself enough to think that's just laziness or excuses. I have believed it to be a legitimate illness. I just never really understood the full specks of it before. Because honestly, it's not something you honestly want to get to know or admit you have. There are lot of labels attached to it, none anyone wants.
Depression is not something people like to be diagnosed with, but it's something that almost everyone experiences throughout some time in their life. Some people are able to deal with it better than others, doesn't mean that there's something wrong about those others. Depression hits people in different ways, and therefore, people deal with it differently. Some even need medication to deal with it. There's no harm in it. Sometimes, it could even be beneficial to some. See, this is what fascinates me. I want to find out more, I want to help people. Mental illnesses have always lured me. Its part of the reason I want to become a psychologist, to help people with dealing with illnesses such as depression.
Autism is another disorder that has drawn me to this profession. I know I could always immerse myself in the programs that help these individuals. But I want to involve myself in their lives, know the struggles and help them. I want to give them someone to talk to when it seems hard to talk to someone else. Social disorders attract me. The way someone can be so intelligent in one aspect and inept in another. Then again when you think about it that could be said for all people. But this is like, um, when you think of a beam on the tip of a triangle edge, balancing like a seesaw. That is there's too much on one side; it can make it impossible for the other side to come down.
I have watched individuals be pushed away, and looked down upon by people or groups simply because of the fact that they can't connect as succinctly as others do. Sometimes, they even make fools of themselves in our eyes. But when you look, I mean really look at them, they are unconcerned by the dismissal. And yet, when I look at them, my heart immediately aches. To see such cruel treatment displayed and them not be able to understand that they're being mocked. I sometimes feel disgusted by the way people can simply be cruel because they know that the individual can't understand what they're doing.
I've seen people with this illness say things that make me cringe because I know how people see it. I think don't say that, because I see the looks in other people's faces. And I immediately want to shield them away from those looks like they have fire coming out of them. I have seen assumed friends of these individuals mock them, and I just want to go and either yell or slap that 'friend' in the face. But the thing is that, I don't really know how all this actually affects the individual. And that's what I want to find out. I'm so curious.
Back to depression, there are times when I see sparks of the person you once knew, and you know right then, that you'll do anything to keep those sparks flying. And there are other times when you want to scream and yell at the person. But in the end, you know the only way to help them is to get them to help themselves. Last semester I did a subject on Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. It was never about telling the person what they should do, but getting them to understand on their own the problems in their life. And helping them to mend them. It always seemed to me like the hardest therapy in the world. Because how can you help someone who doesn't want help. Or someone who only hears what they want to hear. I know I just want to tell people what they should do, because I feel that they don't see it. But it's not true. They see it. But even though it's a logical solution in my eyes, someone in their state would be thinking emotionally. And I just want to help them, mend their problems for them, because I want to make it easier. This is why I think that CBT is a hard therapy to use, regardless of whether it's the right one.
Alright, so now I am very much rambling. As I usually do. I have just been so fascinated by mental illnesses lately that I needed to let it all spill out of my head and into written words. Anyway, I must get back to work. As you could probably imagine by my writing this blog is that the store is once again dead. Yippee for me, boredom is just around the corner. Hope you lovelies have a wonder-filled weekend. I might be back later this afternoon, probably due to the lack of life in here. Talk to you then. Ciao!
Cheeky Girl
Biting my finger
Hamlet & Scarlette
