A Long Time Forgotten

I have realised that I haven't written in a while and figured I would give it my best to write again.
I am finding the world is full of unexpected surprises. There's feelings you develop and thoughts you process that you realise you haven't discovered before. I guess that's a part of growing up in a sense. I am sometimes frightened of how things can suddenly jump out at you and how you feel you've ran into a giant reality-bricked wall. There's a lot I am slowly trying to understand. And a lot I am learning to be mature about. Life is like a carousel. It goes round and round until you get dizzy and want to get off and try something new. And it's okay to do so, it's alright to try new prospects and experience things that are at some points increasingly challenging.

What I am getting at is that as I grow older, I decide I want more things. Nothing materialistic, that's never been a characteristic of mine. It's mostly emotional. Like discovering a side of you that you didn't know exsisted and never thought could ever surface. I am finding the mirror reflects different faces everytime I glance into it; it shows a different me - a more attractive, intelligent, exciting personality. An individual that's not so afraid anymore.

There's also new additions to my life. Both unexpected and joyful. For instance, my four boys: Nick, Zepplin, Hamlet & Diego. All of which overwhelm me. I am finding nothing fulfils me more than the experiences I have with them. They're my family.

I guess I am having some sort of revelation, an epiphany of you will. I am realising that there are things I want in life. And that is something that has eluded me for quite some time. I am not trapped in a bubble anymore. I know what I want to be and who I want to be with and where I want to go. I have made a decision; for once in my life, I am certain.